tastefullyoffensive:

via

said by a friend…this sums it up best!:

My mom would be so annoyed… every morning I would run into the kitchen screaming “WE’RE LOSING THEM!!! BEEP BEEP BEEPBEEPBEEP!”

(Source: vogue-ciity)

Bret and I about druuuugs

Bret figueroa: why you send me link for canadian drugs woman
Kayla Harper: because my acct got hacked
Kayla Harper: and i fixed it
Bret figueroa: i was like O.O
Bret figueroa: I DID NOT KNOW SHE DEALT DRUGS
Kayla Harper: and i want you to get high and go get free medical care from a lesbian doctor after slipping on a bunch of ice as a result of that legal high
Bret figueroa: Only in Cananda!
Kayla Harper: YESH

While Bret is filling out a job app with a TON of survey questions...my friends are freaking awesome...

Bret figueroa: blah here comes the onslaught of survey
Kayla Harper: how would you respond to stealing? boxers or briefs? how do you like your morning coffee?.......
Bret figueroa: how do you like your steak? are you into BDSM? are you a shake or smoothie guy? do you prefer blondes or brunettes?
Kayla Harper: LOL!
Bret figueroa: if the world was to end tomorrow how would you respond?
Bret figueroa: do you hate zombies as much as we do?
Bret figueroa: what about vampires?
Bret figueroa: do you believe that hitler could have taken over the world?
Kayla Harper: CAN'T.....BREATHE.....
Bret figueroa: is it alright to receive oral sex on the job? (if you are Bill Clinton you need not answer)
Bret figueroa: While at home do you sing show tunes and cross dress?
Bret figueroa: I am very sexually active: agree, strongly agree, disagree, strongly disagree
Kayla Harper: i would screw the boss for a promotino: true or false
Bret figueroa: i am willing to subject to a drug test and if I fail am willing to share my good shit with my employers
Kayla Harper:
Bret figueroa is typing...
Bret figueroa: answers: strongly agree, agree, disagree (you're fired) strongly disagree:
Kayla Harper: BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

That moment when Mr. Weasley and Doctor House show up at your house to steal your puppies.

asknevillelongbottombamf:

fuckyeahrandomstupidity:

:|

Ten Years Later: A Tribute 9/11
My favorite 9/11 tribute in New York City can be found in Bryant Park. 2,819 empty chairs on the lawn facing the site where the World Trade Center once stood, one chair for every life lost. The number of empty chairs captures the enormity of the lives lost and the stark emptiness of it just drives home the point that I hope is never forgotten. 2,819 people were here one moment and gone the next. 2,819 went to work or boarded a plane one morning ten years ago thinking it would be another ordinary day and they never came home.

"When I run out of space in my closet, I throw out old clothes. When I run out of space in my bookshelf, I buy another bookshelf."

-Dunno…

(Source: emperorjnorton)